How to Respectfully Request Money vs. Gifts.
Nowadays more couples are opting to live together, buy a house and have kids before getting married. More often than not, the recently engaged are fairly settled in their lifestyle and have most of the things once traditionally gifted at weddings. As a result, money is the common gift donated to these couples – its practical, helps them pay off their wedding and honeymoon, or put towards their future as newlyweds.
We often get asked, “How do I respectfully ask for money in lieu of gifts on our wedding day”. The issue of wedding gifts is awkward – for both the giver and recipient. Trust me; everyone understands that you don’t want to receive 5 toasters on your wedding day. If you are going to request money, you have to ensure that you don’t come off as off-putting.
Its always important to assure guests you aren’t EXPECTING a gift – and that their presence is enough. Most guests always gift regardless. There are tactful ways of hinting that you would prefer cash or what you would find useful, like enlightening them of your current living situation or future plans.
The way to formally request is through the invitation. We have seen “Money Wedding”, “Monetary Gifts Preferred” and although formal, it may come off as cold and unappreciative.
The best, most creative and most respectful ways we have seen this carried out is through poetry. Write a poem and send it with your save the date or invite. Keep it short and sweet but inform your guests you would prefer money and what your intentions to do with the money are in a fun and charming way. Keep it personal and appreciative.
Here are some excellent examples of these poems:
We’ve lived together for a year or two,
We really don’t need anything new,
Your presence as a guest, is all that we request,
But if you insist on giving a gift,
Some pennies for our honeymoon would give us a lift!
Love, Bride & Groom
The most important gift to us is have you share our day,
But should you wish to contribute in any other way,
Then to help us on our honeymoon in our chosen paradise,
A little extra spending money would be really nice!
Love, Bride & Groom
Good Luck as you move forward with your wedding planning!